Tuesday, July 29, 2008

Jung SuWon Style camping aka Self Discovery weekend, part 3



After this wonderful and big meal, we were sent to our tents for some rest. Some people that were still attached to civilization, asked for a place to shower or brush teeth, etc.
We got a cup of water from a jar for brushing teeth, and were pointed towards a little stream if we wanted to wash up. No RVs here!!!

By now I didn't have any more expectations as to what would or should happen. I simply had no idea from moment to moment, what was going to happen.

After all that much activity, I slept deeply and well....until I awoke to the sound of the gong! Yes, a beautiful, harmonious sound...I got the idea that now was the time to get up. I stuck my head out of my tent, for once not worried about how I looked, how frizzy my hair was or if I still had sleepy seeds in my eyes.

I figured if they wanted us to rough it, then for sure they wouldn't mind my "rough" look!

We were directed to do a basic morning cleanup - yes, again a trip down to the stream, to the water jug, and one in the great yonder with the shovel...then we were asked to put on our Martial Arts Uniforms and assemble.

Grandmaster Kim appeared, almost out of nowhere. Now I tried to not think too much about anything but be open for whatever comes my way, but how on earth could she look so beautiful, so put together after "camping out" like this?

She welcomed us with a big smile and explained about living in natue, feeling part of nature, being connected to our environment. It was fabulous, a magic moment. Forgotten were all my worries, stresses, concerns. Sitting in the middle of a forest, smelling nature and hearing birds sing, hear the wind go through the trees, and listening to Grandmaster Kim....soon I was in another world.

Then - time for getting physical! After some warmp ups it was time for a rigorous Martial Arts workout, right there in the woods!

And for the rest of the story - come back tomorrow!

Monday, July 28, 2008

Self Discovery weekend - oh yeah!


I missed posting for a couple days - wasn't feeling well...

But I am excited to tell you more about Self Discovery weekend.
So here I was, barely a purple belt, full of excitement, heading out into the middle of nowhere, hours away from any known civilization, into the middle of herds of dangerous animals, poisonous plants and whatever creatures might lurk out there.....

It was way out, for sure. But there were no more dangers other than the ones we created with our own fears.

I remember well my first "traditional" weekend. After I had recovered from the shock of "no bathrooms", and after we set up our tents, we were getting hungry - all that driving and the fresh outdoor air had made us hungry.

Now remember, we weren't supposed to bring any of our own food. It was supposed to be provided. I had secretly been looking around for cans of chef boyardee, or some other prepared food, perhaps we were only going to get some army rations or power bars or something.

But nothing of the sort. We soon found ourselves digging some shallow holes and putting some good sized rocks into them, then adding firewood and startig fires. In no time at all Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim was performing what I call "food magic." In a very old fashioned way, she cooked - and showed us how to - rice, soup, and some Korean meat dishes (I'll go into details about this on my food blog).

That first meal was better than any meal at a five star restaurant. Not only did it taste fantastic, but we all felt a surge of energy inside us, and a deep sense of connection with how the food was made and where it came from.

Stay in tune as to how our next day started, after a peaceful night under the stars (well, ahem, inside the tent...)

Sunday, July 20, 2008

Jung Su Won training - Self Discover Weekends!



Ah yes, those wonderful times, when we went out to some place in the wilderness and trained like we imagined it might have been for the ancient warriors!

Well, this being more modern times, we did have each our own individual tents, and some other small remnants of civilization with us, but for the most part, it was pretty much "roughing it", at least on those original ones...what wonderful memories! We did not keep any watches on us, or cell phones, or pagers. No flashlights, battery operated anything.

We would arrive on Friday night, leaving right after work, and drive for several hours, and then pitch our tents. Then sitting around a campfire...Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim would introduce us to this strange new world...

I will never forget my first Self Discovery weekend - I was barely a purple belt and still so new to a lot of Martial Arts. I asked an instructors where the bathrooms were.

And what do you think I was told? Nothing! I was simply handed a shovel, with a roll of toiled paper stuck on top of it...

More of this tomorrow

Saturday, July 19, 2008

Jung SuWon Training: we are always testing....


See, that's the exciting thing about training at Jung SuWon: you might think testing only happens on certain days, when the nice program booklets are printed out, and we've had a lot of time to practice...and we usually find out weeks in advance, somtimes months, when such testings happen.

However, Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim explained that those testings are but a formality, and while important, the real testing happens each and every day - through our attitude, how we deal with unexpected situations, and so on.

One time, and I believe I was merely an orange belt, we were doing a Martial Arts demonstration at a local school. Back at that time, we never praciced any routines for those demos. Grandmaster would call up students and have them perform things on the spot. I felt relatively "safe" since I was only an orange belt, and what could I show anyhow?

I couldn't have been more wrong. After some bong sparring, multiple partner sparring and breakings performed by our instructors, I found myself being called up with some other relative newbees.

From safe and smug, I was now in the spotlight, right in front of a nice cinderblock, which I was supposed to break. Everyone else in this group broke their boards or bricks just fine, except me. I couldn't focus, was scared, and just was nervous like never before.

So, you would think - this being a demo - Grandmaster would let me just get off the hook and go home, right?

Wrong!

Training at Jung SuWon isn't about performance, although that does have its place. It is about improving yourself, getting to know yourself, finding trust in yourself, and a whole lot more.

So instead of allowing me to give up, Grandmaster - after the offical part of the demo was over and some of the spectators had already left, called me back up to the cinderblock, and said, "well, since you cannot break this one cinderblock, seems to me you need a bigger challenge, and instantly another cinderblock was placed on top of the first one!

I went from fear to panic. There was no getting away from this! And of course, a bunch of curious bystanders gathered quickly around to see what was going on!

Now what!

Anyhow, Grandmaster whispered to me with her big, invincible smile, "I know you can do this! Now go do it!"

Next thing I knew, those cinderblocks broke under a cloud of dust!

Sometimes we need this extra push, and the extra love in our life. Even though we might be perfectly capable of doing something, if we don't believe we can do it, it won't happen. And it helps to have someone at our side, once in a while, to show us that yes, we CAN indeed do it!!!

Thursday, July 17, 2008

Jung SuWon Training: testing time!


Like I said in my previous post, testings are are highly unpredictable. You can just never tell what you'll end up doing.

I remember another testing, I believe I was testing for my redbelt.
Before anything got even started, I heard Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim call my name. I responded almost automatically and ran up, attention bowed, and stood at attention, ready for anything - or so I thought.

Next words I heard, "Sing the National Anthem".
Oh no!!!!!!!!!!!!

One of my huge big fears was singing in public, or even singing at all. I don't like how I sound when I sing, I have a squeaky, hollow voice...and...and...and I just was scared to death to sing in front of anyone, even myself, in the mirror!

So now, I was supposed to sing in front of all these people?

Some helpful soul came running up to me with a microphone..this was getting serious. I had beads of sweat on my forehead and everywhere else, and was shaking. Did Grandmaster really mean it? I mean, she really wanted me to sing?

Yes! She kept looking straight at me, with a big smile, and expectantly. I thought I was going to pass out right there.

But instead, the incredible thing happened. All of a sudden my mind quieted down. In fact, my mind seemed to just go in the background, and let my internal energy take over. All the time I had spent meditating, all the times I had told myself "He Can Do, She Can Do, Why Not Me!" were now showing results.

Before I knew it, I was singing the anthem (it had taken me about 3 weeks to memorize the words, but yes, I did do it!) and I didn't really realize what just happened until after it was all done and I heard applause....

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Jung Su Won training: the impossible is possible!


( This is not me in the picture, nor is it my picture, but I thought it would make for great illustration).

I was just told that all I am posting is 20 plus years old, and that has actually been true so far. But I felt like I can't just tell you about me and my training without giving you a little background first.

Maybe this background is getting a bit too long?

Anyhow, I'll jump forward in time a little bit, to the time in California, and will dwell on one of my most memorable testings at Jung SuWon.

You see, I have always been very afraid of heights. As in, VEEEERY! Even stepping on a short step ladder would bring beads of sweat to my forehead.

Even I was a proud blue belt at the time, and was testing for my brown belt, I was not prepared for what was to come. The thing is, testings at Jung SuWon are just not predictable. There are very few "set rules" at a testing. Sure, you need to know your forms, you need to do some breaking (although you may not end up doing what you were planning to do) and its a good bet that there is some sparring involved. Beyond that, well, just be mentally ready for whatever.

So I was done with all the forms, sparring and breaking and I thought I was pretty much all done. Not so. Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim asked some senior belts to lower the ropes. At the time, we had ropes suspended from the ceiling, and they were connected with each other via a rope across the ceiling. The goal being to climb up one rope, shimmy across and come down on the other rope.

I had until then never been able to do this, and from my first attempts it didn't look like I would do it that day either. I gave it a few half hearted tries and was ready to write it off as "I am too heavy" (I wasn't), or "I am too old" or "I am too clumsy" or whatever.

After several attempts Grandmaster took me into her office - stopping the testing - and sat me down. She said, "I know this is hard for you. But I also know you can do it. If you can do this today, you can do anything you set your mind to. Now lets go out and do it!"

The rest I don't remember too clearly, but I am told that I marched out of the office, and with new determination approached the rope, climbed up, went across and came down, to the thunderous applause of everyone. At the bottom of the rope Grandmaster Kim was waiting for me, with a big hug.

I will never forget this proud moment!

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Jung SuWon Training: a very unusual Christmas party





Since I started training in late fall, I was invited to the Jung SuWon Christmas party.

At first of course I wasn't going to go at all. I was too shy and I didn't like parties. And I hardly knew anyone there yet, and after all, I went there to work out and learn martial arts, not go to parties...I had any number of excuses as to why not go to the party.

But Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim was so, well, inviting, that I simply couldn't resist. Her beautiful smile, encouraging words, well at least I was willing to give it a try and besides, I could always go home if I had enough, right?

It was a potluck, so I offered to make dessert (desserts are my specialty and I am going to start a blog on that subject soon). The occasion being a Christmas Party, I was going to make a gingerbread house. I spent 3 days making it, painstakingly, with candy glass windows, and leaving my kitchen a sticky mess :)

Anyhow, at first I felt so awkward at that party, and was going to go straight home, but it turned out fun, exciting, and entertaining and before I knew it I had a lot of fun and was part of the group.

We had a nice dinner and people shared why they made the food they did and I don't remember all the details, but everyone liked the dessert and Grandmaster made some nice comments and praised me...something I so much needed at the time. People were doing all kinds of performances, singing songs, some skits, and it was all very nice.

I started to realize that Martial Arts wasn't just a good workout, it could actually be a way of life...if I was ready to go for it....

Monday, July 7, 2008

Jung SuWon training - one step at a time





So, one day, after Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim's prompting, I felt somewhat ready to join in the regular Jung SuWon class.

Was I ever scared! I felt so out of place! I couldn't keep up with the class and felt like everyone was staring at me and making fun of me. Of course, no such thing! Everyone was very nice to me and besides, everyone was way too busy participating in class to watch what I was doing!

So I stumbled along, halfway embarrassed, halfway starting to enjoy it....the energy was so catching that before class was over, without realizing it, I had a lot of fun, it was exciting, and I was glad I went!

However, one more hurdle I hadn't counted on....at the end of class, everyone was shouting it out ...HE CAN DO, SHE CAN DO, WHY NOT ME! And even though this motto had carried me through very tough times the past couple of months, I still couldn't do it in class....shyness took over and I just stood there, mumbling a very quiet he can do she can do why not me....hoping nobody would notice me...

To my utter surprise, after class, Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim told me I did a great job and encouraged me to come to class again...and other students walked up to me, welcomed me....I felt very warm, welcome, and downright good.

I was hooked.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

Jung Su Won: my very first classes at Jung SuWon



Ah yes, my first classes at Jung SuWon! Did I mention I was to shy to even participate in a regular Martial Arts class? It's true! I was not going to do it!

However, Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim helped ease me into it and let me start taking private classes at first. What a relief! At least I could feel clumsy, uncoordinated, shy, awkward, and simply just strange, and not have to worry about other people's reactions.

So for the first couple of months of my training at Jung SuWon, I came only once a week, for a private class. I was kind of intrigued by class, but yet way too scared to join. So I would practice at home during the week what I learned on Saturdays, but simply couldn't see myself joining class.

...You should see me in class now....

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Jung SuWon training: determination




I have to add that I re-discovered a whole lot of determination. In order for me to be able to go to Jung SuWon class, I had to find a babysitter first, pick up the sitter or drop the kids off at the place, and then go to Jung SuWon. Well, think about a cold Vermont winter, snowstorms, etc. But somehow, when class time rolled around, I went out to pick up the sitter (she didn't have a drivers license yet), or, took the kids to drop them off.

I remember one time in particular, it was almost blizzard conditions and I couldn't see the street too well. But out I went, praying all the time, saying to myself, I can do this! I so much desired to go to class and learn from a real Master, that nothing could hold me back. Was I scared? Sure I was! But I didn't let that hold me back - not anymore! Armed with Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim's motto: "He Can Do, She Can Do, Why Not Me!" I made it through just about any challenging situation.

No, it wasn't a complete white out of course. But for me, who had just recently gotten my drivers license myself, it was quite the challenge. And the feeling of pride, of accomplishment, was very very sweet.

Every little success boosted my spirit....

Next time, I'll share more about my very first Jung SuWon classes...I just realized I missed that part....

Friday, July 4, 2008

Jung SuWon Training applied in everyday life



At the time I started training at Jung SuWon, I was living way out in the country in Vermont. So way out that the mail man didn't bring mail to the house, but to a cluster of mailboxes at the turnoff from the country road. It just so happened that the people living in the house across the mail box owned a very big dog that would always come running out after me when I went to get the mail, and was snapping at me and sometimes even nipping me.

So - being too fearful and shy to call the neighbors to control their dog, I began to avoid the mailbox altogether and asked other people if they could please pick up the mail for me.

After a couple of months of training, after having attained just a little glimpse of confidence, I dared walk to the mail box again. This time I had a plan. Sure enough, the dog came charging after me, barking louder than ever and looking very scarey with all those teeth!

However, this time, I dropped into a cat stance and let out the loudest ki up I had ever produced! I was determined that this dog would from now on respect me and leave me alone.

To my complete and utter amazement, the dog stopped immediately, and walked away. From then on we were best friends!

Yes, it does seem like such a small thing, but to me, this was everything - it showed me that yes, I could change! I didn't have to accept everything as it came, but that I can fight back and do things my way!

Thursday, July 3, 2008

Always new things at Jung SuWon




And yes, for the record, after a few weeks I was also able to do the one armed push ups!

Great Grandmaster Kim always reminded us in class that we shouldn't just stop there -whatever we learn in the Do Jang, we should take with us and practice in our every day life.

Well at first that made little sense to me. I mean, who am I going to punch and kick, right? But then I started to think a little bit below the surface and realized that it was my attitude I need to carry with me wherever I go, that I need to have the "Can Do!" attitude always. Not just in the Do Jang.

That wasn't easy either. It's so much easier with your teacher right there, encouraging you every step of the way. But without that, at home, wherever you go, that wasn't so easy.

I was very very shy and even making a simple phone call was a big deal for me. But, again, what did I have to lose? I started experimenting with this concept and it was amazing what I found myself doing....

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Continued Changes through Jung SuWon training



Every day brought new challenges and new victories. Even little things boosted my attitude and helped me "stick with it". Every day I saw a little progress. For example, I thought I could never do a back pushup, never mind a series of them.

It is one of the warm up exercises at Jung SuWon, and in my mind I had given up and put it aside as a "just can't do it". But something inside me was nagging at me and wanted to test this "He Can Do, She Can Do, Why Not Me" out, even in a small way. So since my arms were weak, I started out by doing "girl pushups" and general exercises to strengthen my arms, while still practicing those back pushups. One week passed, then two and three, and still I wasn't able to do them. But I figured, what do I have to lose? Even if it takes me 2 years, at least I can do them! So one day after about 6 weeks, I celebrated my first back push up!

Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim had a big smile for me that day....and raised the bar by telling me a one armed push up would be my next thing to conquer.....