Meanwhile, at Jung SuWon

Of course, I didn't stop the physical Jung SuWon Martial Arts Workout. That in itself was a big struggle for me.

After many years of being a couch potato, and after having two children, you can imagine that I was quite out of shape. Not fat - in fact I was anorexic - nevertheless completely out of shape.

But that wasn't the worst of it. The worst part was having to remember so many new things, like all these Korean expressions, remember how to tie my belt (don't laugh but it took me about 3 weeks to do it right and I have a college degree) and the same of course with learning forms. I actually resorted to taping arrows on the floor so I could remember which direction to go, and instructions as to what techniques to do once I turned.

Through it all, Grandmaster Kim was very patient and always was there for me when I was struggling. It didn't matter to her how small or how large my struggle was, she always encouraged me, never ever laughed at me, and showed me step by step that I could change, improve myself, and reach any goals I set.

What a concept!

Slowly I also learned some Ki energy forms, to help me stay focused, calm, and centered throughout the day. At first, oh what stress! More to remember!

But again, the step by step process helped and eventually I was able to retain....all part of the learning and changing program...

More about "beginning meditation"

So there I was, trying to meditate every day.

After the initial "so what am I supposed to do, and how" it became a challenge and I was determined to get the hang of it, but somehow the harder I tried and tried to force "meditation success" (whatever that was supposed to be) the less I liked the process and thought I was failing. Instead of peace and harmony I experienced stress!

Grandmaster Kim had a good and benevolent laugh at this and very patiently told me to simply relax and have a good time and not trying to "do it right." Almost like a date with myself.

Now this was something I could relate to and after a few days I was actually starting to look forward to this peaceful, quiet, and relaxing time. I had no major experiences, just enjoyed the harmony and nice time I had to myself. I was finally relaxing!

Even during the day, other than during my meditations, I started feeling the benefits of it. In stressful situations, I would apply the newly learned breathing methods. Instead of getting all worked up, I would quietly breathe, and focus and was able to diminish the stressful times in my life.

Again, no drastic, overnight change, but a beautiful "work in progress" was starting to take hold.

My first attempts at meditation

Well, at first I wasn't so sure what meditation was supposed to be. When Grandmaster Kim told me that I needed to meditate every day, I really had no clue.

She started me out with baby steps: just sit down in a quiet spot, at a quiet time of day, where no other things are interfering, light a candle and focus on the flame. Thank goodness she didn't ask me to not think anything!

Grandmaster Kim explained to me that if I am so pre-occupied with not thinking about anything, I would end up thinking about not thinking....and so would get lost right away.

Instead, she advised, just let thoughts come as they will, and let them flow through. Don't hold on to anything, but let the thoughts come and then let them go again. Let the thoughts settle down until peaceful feelings set in.

I must admit, my first try was just that: an attempt. I remember sitting there, staring at this candle, and wondering how long I would have to sit there, and if I would ever have some profound experience. I was also wondering how this would or could help me with my problems.

But, I was hanging on to one thing: Grandmaster Kim had asked me to give it a try and I figured it would be worth the try.

So, I kept "meditating"......and sure enough, after just a few times, I started to feel this new calm feeling, something I hadn't felt before.....

....but more about that later....

Keep on Trying!

Of course, just by joining a Martial Arts Class and admiring a new found Master doesn't automatically guarantee anything and no miracles happened. It did take hard work, sweat and even tears now and then.

But, like everything else worthwhile in life, what effort you put in is what you get out. It was hard to erase old habits, old attitudes, old thoughts that I had let become engrained in my head.

Here is one simple thing I learned: if something seems too hard to do, just tell yourself you only have to do it for one minute (or for however long you think you might be able to handle it). Then after that one minute, give yourself some credit and make it another minute. When you feel comfortable that you can do a minute no problem, up it to 5 minutes, or whatever you feel comfortable with). And keep going like that. Pretty soon you'll realize it's not such a big deal after all.

This method was my life saver back then, and I still keep going back to it to get me over the rough spots in life.

Although now of course, after many years of training, I do know and have the confidence that whatever comes my way, somehow I will be able to handle it, and handle it well.

He Can Do, She Can Do, Why Not Me!

Hello,

Today I would like to leave you with this video - here is where Dr. Tae Yun Kim says her trade mark motto, which has inspired me so much in my life.

He Can Do, She Can Do, Why Not Me!

The story continues

So after meeting Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim, I had new hope. At least there was hope! I didn't expect an overnight life changing experience, and I didn't have one either. But I did realize that I didn't have to be stuck.

Grandmaster Kim's energy was contagious. Never a judgemental word from her. Only encouragement and cheering me on. Even though she had many students, she always made me feel special. Whereas before I had always been compared to others (and trust me there is always someone better out there than you.. ) or just plain been told very negative and derogatory things, now I heard so much positive that it took time for me to believe in it.

But there was no denying: Grandmaster Kim's strategy worked. By having me work out at Jung SuWon and learning the Martial Arts, I, the couch potato, learned how to kick, punch and block, and not just that, I learned how to kick away my fears, punch out all the negative experiences, and block away judgmental attitudes. Slowly but very surely I was gaining confidence in the new "me".

Grandmaster Kim's motto "He Can Do, She Can Do, Why not Me!" came true. Yes, I can, too!!!!

Meeting a real Master

Before I start with what's going on in my life right now, I have to say a few things as to how I got to the "here and now."

Well, it was in the early 80s back in Vermont. My life wasn't going as I had hoped for. Sure, I had a great education, was married, had 2 kids, house, car, and what not. All seemed to be going great and anyone around me would have thought "she's got it all."

But on the inside I was dying. I had a lot of personal and family problems. I was deeply unhappy, was starting to fall back to being anorexic, which I had been ever since I turned 16, and just was wondering if this was all life had to offer.

Then, one Saturday in foggy November, I tagged along with someone to a Martial Arts studio. Now at the time, I had no idea what Martial Arts was. I came from Salzburg, Austria and we didn't know anything back then about Martial Arts. So after it was explained to me, I thought this was way too brutal and savage for me, but would come along since I didn't have anything better to do.

I remember well walking into this tiny Do Jang, where this beautiful oriental girl in white pajamas (what did I know about uniforms!) and the very first thing she said was "Who is your worst enemy?" And the group of people - presumably her students - answered together "Myself Ma'am."

I was floored. That was part of Martial Arts? If that was indeed part of it - I wanted it. I knew I needed help, and that one little question made me realize that perhaps I would find help here.

Shortly thereafter the class was over and I found myself in that young girl's office - it turned out that she was actually Grandmaster Tae Yun Kim!

She assured me that I wasn't a bad person and only needed to re-direct my energy and I would be whole soon. She made me feel very welcome, very much at home, and there was no pressure for anything, whatsoever.

I liked her proposition: You try it my way, and if you don't want to do that anymore, then simply go back to doing things your way.

Deal! This was the day my new life began.

An introduction is in order

Hello,

This is a new adventure for me, and an introduction is in order. I thought this would give you a little bit of an idea who I am and what my passion in life is:


Please do follow the link...and have a great day!